Sometimes I look back at my life as it has unfolded and I wonder why I'm where I am. I'm a loving person and yet I find myself in a place that is devoid of personal (private) love. It's there outwardly but there is no intimate love. I was trying to remember the last time I was touched that left me feeling warm and fulfilled. I can't bring a single moment to mind for at least the past 18 years. Everything is fleeting, no feeling attached.
The years are getting away from me.... I'm afraid I'll die without knowing what it feels like to be really connected to another human being. How did I get here?
